A lot of parents have been getting their kids to me for their bed wetting issues (the kids) at night. This can occur between ages of 3 till even 12 and early teenage years. The first rule is – NEVER EVER make your kids feel bad about this. Shaming them, comparing them with siblings or other kids that don’t bed wet is the worst thing to do and honestly. How will comparing solve the problem of bed wetting? If it’s not a medical issue of a weak bladder or sometimes urine infections, which is very rare, the most common reason we have determined is either a conscious or unconscious fear in the child.
Children can have their own set of fears and insecurities, no matter how happy the parents may think they are or how much the parents do to ensure their children are happy and stress or fear free. Children can pick up fears from the conversations they hear at home, fights they see, news they are exposed to, school, society, teachers, bullies, social media, unsupervised programs, TV shows, movies, music, from anywhere (adults pick fears from the same sources too).
At night these fears can rise in the subconscious mind and lead to bed wetting.
Communicate communicate communicate. Our children need to know they can have a safe conversation with us anytime. We need to create that space. Sit down with them, diagnose, get to the root cause, observe their feelings, emotions, etc. Always let them express. If we try to control too much and induce fear in them, they shut up quickly. Children should know and most adults too, that expressing fears are no sign of weakness.
- Less liquids towards bed time
- Early dinners and finish hydration way before bed time.
If your kids bed wet, comfort them. Let them know it’s okay, instead of shouting. It’s a phase and it will pass.
Love = Understanding. We can’t shout at our children and make them feel bad and misunderstood. Keep telling that you love them. Love = Understanding. We rather understand the root cause that gives them comfort and opens communication channels.
– Luke Coutinho