When I started my career, which is roughly 8 years ago, in Integrative and Lifestyle Medicine, I was a people pleaser to establish myself in a new field that’s unheard of. My career prior to that was in a corporate for several years, where you just follow instructions and rules and work towards your KRA’s set. As I took the plunge and decided to move on and follow my passion, I found myself unconsciously behaving as a people pleaser – just to fit in, just to be accepted, not me, but my area of work.
I used to spend hours and hours, days and days – going out of my way to prove myself. I didn’t charge for my work or worth. I went over and above to get people to like my work and to make them understand what it is that can help people recover from disease and prevent. Lifestyle was just a word. Immunity was just a word. No one cared and believed in the massive potential of these two words if implemented.
The more I followed this unconscious path of being a people please, the more and more unfulfilled and unhappy I felt from within. I was wondering why my work was not fulfilling me. I was getting fabulous results with my patients; business was good and steadily growing but I felt empty from within. I knew my path was right, I knew my philosophy and action plan around lifestyle and immunity was everything and it was working on improving health. I moved from 3-4 emails a day to a hundred plus. I had calls coming in through our 1-800 number. I was flown across Europe, the U.S the Middle East to see patients etc. But that feeling ……that low feeling was just not being fulfilled. And then! I happened to watch this favourite movie which I had watched several years ago, again. “Coach Carter”, was the name of the movie and in that there is quote that made me reflect, meditate and change my life and bring that feeling of not joy, but bliss to my life.
I am sharing that quote here. I hope it changes your life like it changed mine.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
– Marianne Williamson

I understood why I was in a people pleaser mode. I didn’t respect my own self-worth. I had every bit of data to know that Lifestyle medicine was working, I just didn’t live up to that. I shrunk myself to fit in. I changed a lot of my friend’s circle because they clearly couldn’t be happy for my success and I would shrink to fit in and be accepted. I would underplay myself. I would underplay my success, would come down to a below average level just to fit in and be accepted at a benchmark of under average. And then this quote changed my mind pattern, belief system, and Oh! What a change it was!
We need to be proud of who we are. We can never let someone steal our light. People will want you to vibrate at their level, but you got to vibrate at the level which you are meant to vibrate at. People will want you to step into darkness when you are in light, but we need to continue on being where we are meant to be.

We need to be super proud and not arrogant, assertive but not submissive, emotional but not emotionally weak.
Mistakes are real and every human will make them but people will use them against you to bring you down. Our strength is in staying on the path we are put and move on without being pulled from side to side or under. The only way is forward and all this starts with our mindsets and knowing our self-worth. Every day children, teenagers, adults across the world have their self-worth being stripped away from them by social media, fake friends, wrong company, drugs, TV bingeing, virtual unreality, etc
I meet so many of the above who have no idea how talented, fabulous, amazing they are. They simply can’t see or feel it, because their minds are blurred by all these dopamine accelerators. They are disconnected and when we are disconnected how can we ever feel what our true self and soul is trying to tell us? How can we see how much potential we have? How fabulous and amazing we are? Every human being has something in them that is unique and if that is used, it can result in unbelievable results.
People cannot define us. We have to define us. We have to decide our self-worth, not others. We have to decide to be happy and content and keep happiness independent of circumstances. We have to overcome fears and let our light shine bright.
I hope this quote can impact your life as much as it impacted mine.

– Luke Coutinho

Also watch:
Simple Ways to Boost Self Esteem in Your Children
How our Self Worth Affects our Stress Levels